Are a bunch of people offering to help with the wedding but you don’t know how to field those responses even though you know, eventually, you’ll need the help? This free template offers a way to acknowledge the offer and then take concrete next steps to make good on it.
Want to download this for free? Here’s the Google Doc. You might also get value from my book.
Subject line: Thank you for your offer to help with the wedding!
Dear [INSERT THE FIRST NAME(S) OF THE PERSON OR PEOPLE YOU’RE WRITING]:
Thank you again for offering to help with [INSERT YOUR PARTNER’S FIRST NAME] and I’s wedding. Your support of our relationship means the world to us.
We don’t know yet how we need help but we have created a list of folks who have volunteered. If we decide to take you all up on this offer, we will be in touch no later than one month before the wedding. If you don’t hear from us at a month out, consider yourself off the hook. If you need an answer sooner than a month out, please let us know.
In the meantime, thank you again for your kindness and support! We are greatly looking forward to celebrating together.
Love [or the sign-off of your choice],
[INSERT YOU + YOUR PARTNER’S FIRST NAMES]
How do we send this?
Keep it simple. Often, these requests come via text so use that medium (though if the text gets long, move to email). These conversations can also usually happen very easily in a call or in person. It’ll depend on how you most often communicate effectively with this person.
What do you do AFTER you send this message?
You make a list! Yes, really! Include the name of the person, their pronouns (if you don’t have them memorized), contact information, and a one- to two-sentence description of how they offered to help, if they had specific details.
Set a reminder for six weeks before the wedding. The goal of this reminder is for you and your partner to decide if you do, in fact, want to take anyone up on their offer to help. Remember, you told these people that if you do need them, you’ll tell them four weeks before the wedding so the six-week out reminder is to give you two space to decide what you need.
If you decide to take someone or multiple someones up on their offer to help, tell them. This is usually most efficiently done via email but if the people you’re talking to aren’t so great on the email, use the mode of communication that you know works best with them.
Be very clear on:what you expect them to do
when and where they’re expected to arrive to complete this task
if they’re bringing anything to complete this task
who their contact is from here on out or, at the minimum, who their contact is on the wedding day (really, really try for that contact not to be you)
Note to reader: Did you notice how much I use “our” and “we” in the above? That’s because it’s important to approach any decision about your wedding as a unit. The wedding industry, let alone other people, will try and isolate you but this wedding is a joint project. Treat it as such.